Families, Communities and Races

God's presence and power!!! We often speak on how much trust is put in him, but have we shared that caring, understanding and support from our hearts? Because it's our human nature and nothing more? In truth, we have been hypocrites in many ways. Not nearly close as friends or even neighbors on this planet, but very quick enemies and chosen strangers offering the harsh realities of malice in attitude and a bloodshed with violence. Programmed, motivated and inspired in the causes of the gun all across the world...but even more so, right here in our streets, businesses, homes and schools of these United States of America. Why? It seems as if it's become the most meaningful course of action to take with a display of emphasis..equivalent to the ideas of a wild wild western novel...isn't that something to think about? When will the evasiveness of responsibilities toward looking at the true state of these "dysfunctions" at it's core stop? We're not just following those "high-end" psychological analysis on various issues any longer. Let us look at ourselves as families, communities and races!!! In family there's the heirarchy that regulates from grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, siblings, cousins and extended relatives through marriage. All of which is suppose to operate in the order of love and equality...However, there exists the presentation of selfish complexities that arises constantly. It is the duties of the knowledgeable to direct the impressionable with a moral compass and substance, but if it is done so by force and not of understanding, what is the lession??? That force is power!! Not right or wrong...but force!! So, as one goes out to interact with the rest of society the belief that whenever things aren't going our way we can incorporate force and make it otherwise. In community there's the developing regularity that anyone not of "that" community will be automatically looked at in suspicion to the possiblities of anything negative, instead of building a positive introduction about that person. Each neighborhood will block themselves off by lifestyles, attitudes and classes as a way of defining who we believe are more likeable than the rest in society and begin imitating the lessons of superficial and materialitsic values. "If you're not in my group" you're despicable kind of thinking. In race, there's the cultural and obvious differences of appearances, but the misconception and sick notion that either is better is simply because of what they look like and therefore creating this absurd competion of showcasing as if we're in a full on mating ritual of some sort. LOL It's really crazy once you think about it. To conclude...what are the "ghetto's" and the "boardwalks"? How do you see yourself in it? Are you really who you feel you've been? Is there a deeper calling surfacing in your spirit, leading you to the journey's of unanswered questions? The desire to be "noble" as the odds have been stacked against you in many endeavors? What are your thoughts about seeing systems put in place that emphasize only material success and de-emphasize their methods which serves to justify what takes place in the name of law and order, education, economics and lastly religion? Separatism through levels of continued classism? What roles do you enjoin with the acceptance of false advertisements of equal opportunity? What examples will you live by to rise above dismay? Will you become responsible for all children even when most of their own parents have not? Will you invest in the talents of all communities even if no one else cares to? Will you advocate love and prove to all communities that together we're the richest resource on the planet contrary to the stereotypes? Will you become a "nobody" and hate everyting about the world not knowing any better? Or worse, will you only follow your dreams become "somebody" and jus forget about everyone else? This should be a very great dialogue:) Thanks for participating...

Will We Please Stand For Tomorrow???

Thoughts look into the future...and these eyes have become heavy with sadness, because I see no one left to speak out for the kids. Who gives a damn about titanium rims and a jumpshot...Rap albums about a fantasy? Wrong message!!! We all should be exemplifying education, not how to pick up a pistol or push a pack, or take something from another person. Love does seem oxymoronic these days, because the feeling doesn't suit it's actions...Love is the act of living and life is but a breath, yet to be aware is to truly be alive... Materialism is our downfall like cryptonite is to superman, but if he dies in a comic book the writer can easily replace him by rewriting another issue. For us on the other hand there is no coming back... Please no, it's not time yet, please God!!! Aaah, Disgraced in self-reflections face stuck in the expression of exhaustion all because we cannot escape the authenticity of an always truthful mirror. Puzzled by the lingering shadow of demanding expectations, pressure's building and the hearts have become congested as if we've been ciphering syrup. Dedication is lacking to establish perfection instead of error, as habits run like faucet water unpurified and rustic...It's time to grab the phallic by it's head and adjust it to respond accordingly and not the other way around, because if the mind is not home how can one be entrusted to conduct the rulership of any foundation or houshold??? Walking around like half-ape and not just really half-baked, confused over being irate over the murder rates, now isn't that a sad state? Especially when we're suppose to be the figure heads and not some experiment throughout these vast tech's that got tails shaking to the whistle like a lab test. Aarf-Aarf... Agitated nuts flexing, expand and contract while holding on tight, yeah... I'm all masculine. If you believe that'll be enough, chalk it up to an asterisk and pour out some liquor as a tribute to the "real". How's that for a vigil?! We would've been better off standing atop their graves and pissing on it's R.I.P.!! Same difference...Effect the world and if it must be made "squarish", it's the right centerpiece to nourish a brand new era. So, are we keepers of each other and leaders of the children? I would like to believe it's possible...Sacrificing the time and efforts to dig deep against the landmines of the mirage and it's experiments behind these trap doors... To conclude...There are bodies standing in the way of progress. There are good hearted men, and there are great men of example. Who do you want to become??? I hope you're not mad at me, but take this as a challenge because we all need to be pushed in the right direction.

**The following is a picture drawn by Timmy Morgan that he requested to be posted with this entry**

A Subjugated Living

I have prepared this particular discourse hoping to open a bridge of understanding about issues of many that should be handled in much more proper ways than they've been thus far. Now, I shall only assume that because you are not personally subjected to the experience of this prison situation...recognizing the magnitude of humiliation and it's psychological damages would come as an unforseen mystery, but trust me...friends, families and strangers....had you experienced this personally, I do believe that your rationale would be of a completely different mind set than it has been up to this point. Am I correct?! There are outstanding amounts of behavior that border on the extreme and very unprofessional and can almost certainly more often than not create a risk to the order of the prison systems themselves. The standards practiced are very inconsistent and let me just say without getting too vulgar here, that "defecating and having enough wiping materials is perpetuated as if it's a priviledge and not a human right." One does not correct the "criminal" thought process by agitating the person or person's to rebel against an enforced order of authority to justify it's abuse or worse yet drive people to suicide...believe me it's very much real and it continues to light the fire underneath those who are helpless in their spirits nevertheless, but even for those of us who have found God wholeheartedly in our lives...we are challenged to the core in such ways that only God's love and mercy is keeping us upright and steadfast by his will. Imagine yourselves in a closet pantry at your home and in that pantry, there's a toilet and sink almost adjoined above it...then a steel bunk only an arm distance away with an inch thick foan mattress covered in colored plastic...now put two people inside the pantry with no idea of what the other is thinking and having to trust that you can close your eyes long enough to sleep or get an understanding amongst strangers. Imagine having to do everything abnormally fast or otherwise not be able to do it at all. For instance like the simple task of eating. How unhealthy is it to the digestive system to literally stuff half chewed foods down your throat to beat the meal stoppage time, which is a matter of minutes?! Every possible avenue being targeted to specifically suppress any social qulities that might be beneficial for you in the future if you're fortunate to have one. Treated like the mistake that you made and not a person...What do you become??? Any sane person would rather live in a dog kennel and be free, than to be treated like tortured livestock hoping for slaughter just to end it's misery. I've told you to imagine, but guess what?! To really have to go through this as once a teenage for numerous years is much more terrifying than having to imagine, because it's real!!! The officials you've entrusted to the correction and preperation of prisoner's for possible release have let you down in large fashion. It's all a pay check and many prisoner's end up getting out far worse than when they've come in because of it. There are many who have been an exception to the rule though and that's got alot to do with learning all they could through self studies, spiritual studies and the blessings of having wholesome human interaction with the people of society who haven't lost hope, who forgive, and who teach by the examples of love because it's the right thing to do. Please, do not negate yourselves by being misinformed otherwise it continues to fuel the stereotypes that eventually push for new laws to be created, that eventaully yourselves or your children may some day be oppressed with. Remember that we're all only human and all make mistakes, but then again what do I know? In your eyes, I might very well be just another opportunistic criminal with a hidden agenda... or maybe your eyes have not been as observant as you'd like to believe they have been? Good question...I assure that I'm not, but I'll leave you with this old age saying "Don't judge a book if it has yet to be completed, because there's always room for change on what's left of it's pages". Thanks very much for listening.

Are you Appreciated???

Women of the world, Hello...It's only me so fret not. I've pictured love in my mind that I only pray all of you will experience in your lives some day. It goes beyond your curves for the purpose of sex, touching you with only mind blowing chemistry. Proceeding for one phenominal build up and making the wait so much more desireable and deserving. To be ravished in ways that I doubt you can imagine, but you kind of get the picture. Tinkle throughout your spine. LOL Anyway, it's important to be known because when love is involved who wants to be hurt? This is what happens though when you just randomly act on sex because it's there, misunderstanding the connection. Is it worth being too adventurous if it's risking your virtue as women? Let alone risking some kind of potention infections? It's natural for "it" to get wet, no doubt it's not a question. But there's really other suggestions...wait a minute!!! So, are you saying that I should self explore? Hey, all I'm saying is that, if you're looking for love let love be bigger than sex, because if sex is bigger than love there goes that relationship. To conclude...There is love for all of you who know how to command it properly. Be strong, be modest, and never settle for an ass because you can't stand to be alone. They always break hearts, never thinking to nourish them. But if you like having that kind of drama in your life... How can anyone question your taste?! Something to think about.

TAKE A LOOK AT ME

ENCLOSED WITHIN A ROOM EXPOSED TO A NIGHTMARE, SCRATCHES ON THE WALL TO IDENTIFY THE BEGINNING OF MY UNFORTUNATE FALL AS AN ADOLESCENT TO THE MOMENT OF MY LIFE WHERE I HAVE RISEN AS A MAN. THIS IS ONE EXPERIENCE THAT I WILL NEVER FORGET!!! NOW, WHAT DO YOU CALL THE DIAGNOSIS FOR A MIND THAT CAN'T SEE, OBVIOUSLY THE FIGURE OF A BRAIN THAT WON'T THINK...CAGE ME IN A FUNNEL WHERE THE LIVING IS NOT PEACE, BUT EXPECT ME TO ACCEPT ALL THE THINGS THAT'S NOT ME.. SPEECHES COMING FROM A WORLD THAT'S PRETENDING TO BE CIVILIZED, AND YET I'M PORTRAYED AS THE SAVAGE... THEY ALWAYS SAID THAT WORDS CAN PAINT A THOUSAND PICTURES, BUT WHO'S PAYING ATTENTION TO THE LITERAL AND NOT THE ALLUSION OF ALLEGORY??? SLIGHT RAISE OF HANDS IF YOU FOLLOW WHAT I'M SAYING?! UNTAPPED POTENTIAL, UNGUIDED EMOTION, PHYSICAL CONFRONTATION AND A LIFE THAT'S NOW TRANISHED... TIME LIKE THE JETSONS, PROGRAMMING INTO MILLENIUMS, EXPERIEMENTAL LAB RAT FOR REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY, BUT YET I'M STILL NOT BROKEN... GREW UP IN THE SLUMS, UNNATURAL AS IT COMES... HARSH IS EVERY TEST, BUT NO ONE EVER STOPPED TO WONDER IF I HAVE POST TRAUMATIC STRESS... SO CAN YOU SEE ME NOW THAT I HAVE 25 YEARS TO LIFE??? COME ON TAKE A LOOK AT ME!!!

Food for Thought

MY PSYCHE IS BEING TESTED AND NO ONE CAN HEAR MY FALL, BECAUSE IT MIGHT BE QUITE POSSIBLE THAT I'M THE ONLY ONE LISTENING. DAMN!!! HEARING A VOICE OTHER THAN MY OWN WOULD BE WONDERFUL... BUT CAN I REALLY DESCRIBE THE LONELY EXPERIENCES OF AN ISOLATED WORLD, WHEN I'VE SUPPOSEDLY DROWNED WITHIN THE FLUIDS OF MY OWN BRAIN? PSYCHOLOGICALLY DIAGNOSIS, FRAMED INSANE... THIS SYSTEM HAS ABSORBED ME ONLY FEEDING FROM UNCERTAINTIES OF INFORMATION DERANGED... SO, HOW CAN I TELL IF I'M STILL NORMAL WITHOUT A BETTER OPINION??? OPEN-MINDED NATURE PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR LIVELY HUMANITY, BECAUSE WITHOUT YOU I'M STUCK STRUGGLING LIKE A CHILD WHO'S LOST TRACK OF ITS PLACE IN TIME... WILL YOU USE YOUR CAMERA'S LENS AND DECLARE YOURSELF THE FILM, SO THAT I TOO MIGHT BECOME A FACE OF MEANING? OR HAVE I BEEN ANOTHER LOST CAUSE IN EXISTENCE??? HONESTLY, WHO REALLY DOES GIVE A DAMN...DO YOU???

Christmas Wreath painted by Tim Morgan

This wreath was painted by Tim Morgan, and sent to Margie Cavolina as a gift.

Headline

I cannot erase the choices of my youth, because they've already taken place and I will forever be shadowed with the damages I've caused upon another. However, through maturity I want my time, talents and sacrifices to bring more to the world than what I've taken from it. Now with that being said...Is there more to life than the redundancies of barely human actions? Is there room for allowance to find and be inspired by good people? Is there any value left for the overlooked or are we still unimportant? Is there enough strength to withstand the obstacles of insecurities? Is there still hope and promise in the pits of unjust and despair? Will you peek into the deep and tell me what you see? Can you hear the cries that suffer underneath the stenches of wrong direction? Can you read the markings of the fallen adolescent? Can my potential be resourceful? Can you feel my sincerity since I've now become a man? If you have a voice...maybe it's time that we talk!!

Forward--About this Blog by Margie Cavolina

This is a blog broadcasting the voice of Timmy Morgan, from Green Bay Correctional Institution. In this blog, Timmy expresses his life in prison. He went into prison when he was 16 years old, and is now a man. As Tim's former baseball coach and friend, I am helping him reach his goal of self-expression to the world. In his own words, "I want whatever will allow me to be out there in ways regardless of being physically restrained right now, so that people might come to know my voice on many different topics." The postings in this blog will solely be his words to the world. --Margie Cavolina